I was losing myself to somebody else.

I am so tired!
I am so mad/tired.
I hate my body.
Im like fucking fat as an obese elephant.
Like..EERR. its so annoying.
and like my Friend who i love so much, is still sad, and i hate seeing her like this, she is so great, and she shouldn't be like this.
I miss my life. The life i had when my mom was here.
Just like i know she misses her life.
Everything is just so fucked up at the moment.
My life is stupid. I actually hate it. I don't let it show at school, because if i do everyone is just like oh whats wrong, and i hate it when that happens.
And i hate having to fake a smile, its so annoying, i hate showing emotions that i don't really feel.
Gahh. today doing the hero/heroine
Publish Post i forgot my line, and it is like the simplest line in the world "December 1st 1955. It was not pre-arranged and it was not till after i paid my fare that i had realized it was the same bus driver that had pulled me off the bus in 1943, twelve years earlier."
and then the guy was like how old are you, and i thought he meant the character (well Rosa Parks) and i was like 42. and he was like no... you. and i was like, oh you mean me allie? and he was like yeah
gahh. embarrassing.